Twitter Updates for 2010-05-25
- Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it. — Anonymous #
- Samsung latest mobiles with Cheap Contract Deals http://goo.gl/fb/ScWpi #
- Make a great choice with BlackBerry 8520 Curve deals http://goo.gl/fb/LaTvN #
- Nokia N900 Offer Comfortable Deals http://goo.gl/fb/EhcGr #
- Wi-Fi mobile phones Wi-Fi mobile phones have grown up http://goo.gl/fb/rTfJe #
- Best Camera Phones with Latest Technology http://goo.gl/fb/4Z4l4 #
- "Shut the door, Wales." — George Bryan "Bean" Brumwell – Said to the Prince of Wales #
- If wishes were horses, then beggars would be thieves. #
- Enzymes are things invented by biologists that explain things which otherwise require harder thinking. — Jerome Lettvin #
- Your fortune stateth: Your motives for doing whatever good deed you may have in mind will be misinterpreted by somebody. #
- Your fortune stateth: Your love life will be… interesting. #
- Motorola Milestone A powerful gadget from Motorola http://goo.gl/fb/RX7vr #
- Sony Ericsson Vivaz latest multimedia features handy http://goo.gl/fb/ZGnMw #
- Nokia Phones Incredible Widgets http://goo.gl/fb/WtJjZ #
- Apple iPad access emails listen to music and watch movies http://goo.gl/fb/2Hn6s #
- HTC Desire Deals With Free Gifts Still The 1st Choice Of Many http://goo.gl/fb/GvuR8 #
- "It is sometimes expedient to forget who we are." — Publilius Syrus #
- Chicago, n.: Where the dead still vote … early and often! #
- Blackberry Curve 8900 Contracts – Offering Best Deals http://goo.gl/fb/ZVURP #
- Apple iPhone 4G will be truly amazing http://goo.gl/fb/Fu1yF #
- 3 Months Payday Loans Bridging the financial gap http://goo.gl/fb/i3Bqu #
- Pay as You Go Mobile Phones Most user friendly deals http://goo.gl/fb/WC4du #
- Apple iPhone 4G Rumours Are Buzzing Up http://goo.gl/fb/e0CAY #
- Parkinson's Fourth Law: The number of people in any working group tends to increase regardless of the amount of work to be done. #
- Why are you so hard to ignore? #
- Sex is like snow… You never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it will last. — Anonymous #
- OVERWORK, n. A dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing. — Ambrose Bierce #
- "The nice thing about Windows is- It does not just crash, it displays a dialog box and lets you press 'OK' first." — Sig of Arno Schaefer #
- Nokia X3 Red Generations demand http://goo.gl/fb/Fey1o #
- The Ultimate deals Sim Free Phones and Sim Only Deals http://goo.gl/fb/qljuh #
- Best Nokia N900 Deals offering enticing free gifts http://goo.gl/fb/3i6Lb #
- Nokia X6 Blue Roam Around with Music http://goo.gl/fb/0QPLU #
- HTC HD2 Contract Deals With Windows 7 http://goo.gl/fb/N8y65 #
- "Ohhhh. You ruined my plot to kill Uncle John!" — 3 year old Connor after his dad took his toys off the stairs. #
- A mind is a wonderful thing to waste. #
- Doh doh,….. DOH! — Homer Simpson #
- "Only a mediocre man is always at his best." — W. Somerset Maugham #
- Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts. — Jim Morrison #
- We hate most in others what we dislike in ourselves. — Laurrel K Hamilton, "Narcissus in Chains" #
- *Whack!* "Enough of your snicker bars!" — Julie #
- "Streets full of water. Please Advise." — Robert Benchley – US humorist – Telegram to his editor on arriving in Venice. #
- "A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of." — Ogden Nash #
- A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance. #
- If God is perfect, why did He create discontinuous functions? #
- The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about. — Oscar Wilde #
- Minds, like parachutes, only work when open. — Anonymous #
- "If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed." — Beau Brummel #
- Commitment, n.: Commitment can be illustrated by a breakfast of ham and eggs. The chicken was involved, the pig was committed. #
- The clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society. — Mark Twain #
- THE GOLDEN RULE OF ARTS AND SCIENCES The one who has the gold makes the rules. #
- "The straightest line between a short distance is two points." — Kellie explaining geometry #
- I went to a museum, and it had all the heads and arms of the statues that were in all the other museums. — Steven Wright #
- I always wake up at the crack of ice. — Joe E. Lewis #
- The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people. — Lucille S. Harper #
- Many are called, few are chosen. Fewer still get to do the choosing. #
- In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty. — Thomas Jefferson #
- Take it easy, we're in a hurry. #
- Maybe Computer Science should be in the College of Theology. — R. S. Barton #
- Your fortune stateth: Learn to pause — or nothing worthwhile can catch up to you. #
- "Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about." — Benjamin Whorf #
- "It's like eating puppies!!" — overheard by Aviry & Roxie while passing an ostrich-burger stand. #
- Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. — Samuel Butler #
- The English have no respect for their language, and will not teach their children to speak it. — G. B. Shaw #
- Why is the sun so bright? Make the sun be quiet! — an awakened passenger on a bus trip to New York #
- We would never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world. — Hellen Keller #
- "An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." — Niels Bohr #
- "Endless Loop: n., see Loop, Endless. Loop, Endless: n., see Endless Loop." — Definitions, Random Shack Data Processing Dictionary #
- "The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other poor sons-of-bitches die for theirs." -George Patton #
- I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. #
- When I eat my food…..I love it. — Two Hour Shower #
- Perfection means not perfect actions in a perfect world, but appropriate actions in an imperfect one. — R. H. Blyth #
- "I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and _You_ come home." — Groucho Marx #
- The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we've finished building it. — Anonymous #
- "ASJAUMA" — an interpretation of "Ask your mom" by Doc and Fudge when they were playing scrabble. #
- FREE Blackberry 9700 Bold http://bit.ly/a9DwZj #
- Your fortune stateth: You will have a long and boring life. #
- pi seconds is a nanocentury. — Tom Duff #
- Jen: "I smell like garlic." Bri: "Maybe you're possessed by an evil spirit." Jen: "If all it does is smell like garlic, that's fine by me." #
- President Reagan has noted that there are too many economic pundits and forecasters and has decided on an excess prophets tax. #
- Given my druthers, I'd druther not. #
- The sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up. — Anonymous #
- First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win. — Mahatma Ghandi #
- Relax and take a time out in your new bathroom http://goo.gl/fb/MlSMo #
- Feeling the Pinch from Government Cuts Maybe a Payday Loan Can Help http://goo.gl/fb/t5cYv #
- 'Cool out man! You're freaking my groove.' — the only English one Russian knew. #
- A child's wisdom is also wisdom — Jewish Proverb #
- "Damn… there is nothing that makes me feel more patriotic then pyrotechnics." — Kate during a 4th of July fireworks display #
- I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology… The study of milkmen — Stephen Wright #
- A furore Normanorum libera nos, O Domine! [From the fury of the norsemen deliver us, O Lord!] — Medieval prayer #
- Get the edge you need to sell your house http://goo.gl/fb/rceKm #
- "I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this." — Emo Phillips #
- If you want happiness for a lifetime – help the next generation. — Chinese Proverb #
- The revolution will not be televised. #
- Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of anybody else. — Judy Garland #
- The same people wrote the bible that thought the world was flat. — Unknown #
- "And if you give us any more trouble, I shall visit you in the small hours and put a bat up your nightdress." — Basil Fawlty #
- Your fortune stateth: A long-forgotten loved one will appear soon. Buy the negatives at any price. #
- "The intro and commercial break thingies on this show are weird" — Ellie, while watching MTV's Top 10 Breakdown. #
- "What are you talking about, my random friend?" — Jess R. to Sarah G. #
- "It's Hong Kong action. Anything you know about physics is just going to hold you back." — Robin D. Laws #
- Evilwill always triumph over good, because it is dumb. — Dark Helmet #
- Don't tell me that worry doesn't do any good. I know better. The things I worry about don't happen. — Anonymous #
- Sony Ericsson XPERIA X10 Mini Available Now http://goo.gl/fb/Xp9YM #
- Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all. — Stanley Horowitz #
- I understand the horn-rimmed cachet. — Christopher DeJong, ocassional wearer of horn-rims. #
- "Next to the originator of a good sentence is the first quoter of it. I hate quotations. Tell me what you know." — Ralph Waldo Emerson #
- Your fortune stateth: You have an ability to sense and know higher truth. #
- "Polaroid cameras… those are pretty expensive. I think it costs a lot to develop the film, too." — KD #
- Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God. — Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., Cat's Cradle #
- "You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax–tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough." — Pearl Williams? #
- Samsung Galaxy S i9000 Android Mobile Phone Available To Order On Vodafone http://goo.gl/fb/eDCGB #
- Nokia X6 Deals Now Under pound15 a Month http://goo.gl/fb/wBZmI #
- The Co-operative Motor Group counts down to fantastic discount offer http://goo.gl/fb/sb1DO #
- Xperia X10 Mini Deals Now Available On Vodafone In The UK http://goo.gl/fb/XbPA4 #
- World Cup Supporters Receive Handy Tips for Their Travel Plans in South Africa from… http://goo.gl/fb/iGKMc #
- If the future isn't what it used to be, does that mean that the past is subject to change in times to come? #
- I like the idea of an ancient race — it makes a world feel so…lived in. #
- Ask not for whom the telephone bell tolls… if thou art in the bathtub, it tolls for thee. #
- New Digital Set Top Box Website http://goo.gl/fb/xOurP #
- HTC Desire deals a great opportunity to grab an attractive device http://goo.gl/fb/2lRUI #
- Payday loans online making life simpler http://goo.gl/fb/GLNOl #
- Tube Filling Machine http://goo.gl/fb/vd79O #
- Parcel Delivery Firm Announces Record Growth Figures http://goo.gl/fb/aKBwO #
- "They're *grumble* stupid *cuss* *grumble*." — Tanith #
- "Hug the box nice!" — Jen to Paul, while he was trying to squeeze a box shut. #
- "I'm so high on life, I'm afraid of dying and having flashbacks." — Bob Webb #
- The grace of imperfection is worth more than graceless imperfection. — Alex von Wuthenau #
- A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to make one believe in God. #
- "There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are." — W. Somerset Maugham #
- "My brand-new Scooby-doo boxer-shorts are more and more comfortable by the minute!" — Curt the wonder Field Service Engineer. #
- Age is a defection of experience. — Brian Anthony, "Archangels" #
- A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. #
- I'm not offering myself as an example; every life evolves by its own laws. #
- He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides. — Anonymous #
- The church must be the critic and guide of the state, and never its tool. — Martin Luther King, Jr. #
- "France was a long despotism tempered by epigrams." — Thomas Carlyle #
- "A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats." — Anonymous #
- We don't understand the software, and sometimes we don't understand the hardware, but we can *see* the blinking lights! #
- No man is more unhappy than the one who is never in adversity; the greatest affliction of life is never to be afflicted. — Anonymous #
- You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions. — Naguib Mahfouz #
- You couldn't even prove the White House staff sane beyond a reasonable doubt. — Ed Meese, on the Hinckley verdict #
- Finagle's Creed: Science is true. Don't be misled by facts. #
- There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes. — Dr. Who #
- Actually, this seems to be the basic need of the human heart in nearly every great crisis – a good hot cup of coffee. — Alexander King #
- "The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order." — Brian Pickrell #
- I regret that I have but one life to give for my country. — Nathan Hale #
- Look alive. Here comes a buzzard. — Pogo, character in "Pogo," comic strip by Walt Kelly #
- "There is a certain impertinence in allowing oneself to be burned for an opinion." — Anatole France #
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