Twitter Updates for 2010-06-26
- Wedding Finance- Shares the Burden of Your Fiscal Troubles http://goo.gl/fb/JNZWB #
- Free Contract Mobile Amazing and Useful Deals Designed For All http://goo.gl/fb/Cqwq7 #
- Wear A Pair Of Designer Sunglasses And Set Paradigm For New Era http://goo.gl/fb/NFosr #
- PrePayManiacouk Announces the Release of the Dazzling LG Viewty Smile GT400 http://goo.gl/fb/mPtIl #
- Emergency Cash Loans – Avail Finance for Small Urgent Requirement http://goo.gl/fb/Gif8H #
- After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations. — H. L. Mencken, on Shakespeare #
- I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life. #
- "Censorship, like charity, should begin at home, but unlike charity, it should end there." — Clare Boothe Luce #
- "The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face." — Jack Handy #
- "They set the bus on fire, so they can't ride until May 1st." — bus driver #
- Doh doh,….. DOH! — Homer Simpson #
- There are three things I always forget. Names, faces — the third I can't remember. — Italo Svevo #
- God is a polythiest #
- World Cup 2010 Day 16 previews tips and free bets http://goo.gl/fb/9uhnq #
- Weight loss tips Smart physique smart looks http://goo.gl/fb/8pnuA #
- LG GW620 Deals – Best Deals on LG GW620 http://goo.gl/fb/oZRuk #
- The Apple iPhone 4 is released http://goo.gl/fb/0nsRg #
- Sony Ericsson Vivaz – Sony Ericsson Vivaz Deals On http://goo.gl/fb/2AQAF #
- "The jig's up, Elman." "Which jig?" — Jeff Elman #
- "Applause is the spur of noble minds, the end and aim of weak ones." — Charles Caleb Colton #
- Our children's children will hear a good story. — Richard Adams, Watership Down #
- "The movie is rated R. I'm hoping for the best." — Chris, Cal State, Bakersfield #
- Your fortune stateth: Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy. #
- Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater. — Albert Einstein #
- "A room without books is like a body without a soul." — Marcus Tullius Cicero #
- "Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place." — Johnny Carson #
- There's no real need to do housework — after four years it doesn't get any worse. #
- "George Washington was first in war, first in peace — and the first to have his birthday juggled to make a long weekend." — Ashley Cooper #
- You might have mail #
- "If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your thing." — Warren Miller #
- Let me be clear about this: I don't have a drug problem, I have a police problem. — Keith Richards #
- Happiness, n.: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. — Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary" #
- "Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives." — William Dement #
- "When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims of intact ones." — Peter De Vries #
- "The only one who could ever beat me was the son of a pizza man." — A drunken friend's version of "Preacher Man" #
- To keep our faces toward change, and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate, is strength undefeatable. — Helen Keller #
- Faith, n: That quality which enables us to believe what we know to be untrue. #
- "You're infatuated with someone you love because they're SATAN." #
- I fear explanations explanatory of things explained. #
- At a poster sale: Katherine: Look, the Baby-Sitter's CLub! MK: Uh, Katherine, that's the Breakfast Club. #
- "I don't have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem." — Ashleigh Brilliant #
- DISOBEDIENCE, n. The silver lining to the cloud of servitude. — Ambrose Bierce #
- Your fortune stateth: What happened last night can happen again. #
- DUTY, n. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire. — Ambrose Bierce #
- "…why I'm so sympathetic to the monsters. The answer is simple. Because I am one." — Laurell K. Hamilton #
- I will not forget you. #
- Jeremy: "But giraffes aren't belligerent!" Paul: "Yeah, but if you rubber-banded them to something they might be!" #
- I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't. — Patrick Murray #
- "If angels existed, they'd probably be considered big game." — Don Swain #
- SELFISH, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others. — Ambrose Bierce #
- Vision without action is daydream. Action without vision is nightmare. — Japanese proverb #
- I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. — Will Rogers #
- Dan: "Guess what mommy?" Mom: "What?" Dan: "I'm gay." Mom: "I know, your face is symmetrical." #
- Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else. — Will Rogers #
- Amanda: "I got an original backstage pass from one of the Beatle's concerts for Christmas." Cindy: "Really? Wow, when's the concert?" #
- We ARE as gods and might as well get good at it. — Whole Earth Catalog #
- "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population." — David Letterman #
- It is now 10 p.m. Do you know where Henry Kissinger is? — Elizabeth Carpenter #
- "Two is a couple, three is a crowd, four is two couples, five is a couple and a crowd, six is either three couples or two crowds…" — Alf #
- Every day it's the same thing — variety. I want something different. #
- "With a name like Vixxxen, didn't her parents know she was going to grow up to be a porn star?" — Wayne, while watching Jerry Springer. #
- If the doors of perception were to be cleansed man would see everything as it truly is… Infinite. — William Blake #
- The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much. #
- Serocki's Stricture: Marriage is always a bachelor's last option. #
- Mophobia, n.: Fear of being verbally abused by a Mississippian. #
- Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box. — Wil Shriner #
- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. — Stephen Wright #
- "Natural abilities are like natural plants that need pruning by study." — Francis Bacon #
- Even a mistake may turn out to be the one thing necessary to a worthwhile achievement. — Henry Ford #
- The object of art is not to reproduce reality, but to create a reality of the same intensity. — Alberto Giacometti #
- "What does it matter? And so what if it does." — Phil Wire #
- "Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering." — Anonymous #
- Your fortune stateth: You will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize… posthumously. #
- Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth. — John Lyly #
- The proof in the immortality of the soul is that myriads have believed it; they also believed the world was flat. — Mark Twain #
- Count your age with friends but not with years. — Anonymous #
- Forest fires cause Smokey Bears. #
- Only the dead have seen the end of war — Plato #
- I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear. — Woody Allen #
- One good turn asketh another. — John Heywood #
- "Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road." — Stewart Brand #
- "Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it." — Donald E. Knuth #
- "Well, you should have told me they were there. I wasn't looking" — Sam, after running into a stack of tables with a tractor. #
- Concept, n.: Any "idea" for which an outside consultant billed you more than $25,000. #
- Just more old, broken sh** ! — Alysia, at the Acropolis Museum in Greece. #
- I restore myself when I'm alone. — Marilyn Monroe #
- Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough. — Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper #
- "I can't believe we spent forty bucks on beer and french fries" — Matt, an MTU student, after an afternoon at the bar #
- If you're a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it's real embarrassing if someone tries to kill you. — Jack Handey #
- "Do you think that if I could open it myself I would still BE here?" — Ellie #
- Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. — George Santayana, "The Life of Reason" #
- An ounce of clear truth is worth a pound of obfuscation. #
- To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage. — Lao Tzu #
- Thou hast the keys of Paradise, oh, just, subtle, and mighty opium! — Thomas De Quincey #
- You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair. #
- Nobody ever died of laughter. — Max Beerbohm #
- Gravity is a myth, the Earth sucks. #
- Your fortune stateth: You'll feel much better once you've given up hope. #
- "If something tastes bad and you don't eat it, would it taste better if you did?" — Andy #
- Sure, 90% of science fiction is crud. That's because 90% of everything is crud. — Theodore Sturgeon #
- If you know exactly what you're going to do, what's the good in doing it? — Pablo Picasso #
- Distress, n.: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend. — Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary" #
- "If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because, man, they're gone." — Jack Handey #
- Your fortune stateth: You'll never see all the places, or read all the books, but fortunately, they're not all recommended. #
- "Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business." — Tom Robbins #
- Your fortune stateth: It was all so different before everything changed. #
- Laura: I smell like an onion bagel. Becky: No you don't. Laura: Yes I do. Becky: It seems to be more garlic-y. #
- "Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school." — attributed to Albert Einstein #
- Beauty, of whatever kind, invariably excites the human soul to tears. — Edgar Allan Poe #
- By the way, you know I'm really not random, right? Deborah's random. I'm just not listening. — Liz F. #
- "?" — Victor Hugo – Entire telegram sent to his publishers asking how _Les Miserables_ was selling, the reply: "!". #
- We have met the enemy, and he is us. — Walt Kelly #
- "You're so violent. You watch James Bond." — Funcoland customer to her husband in protest to his wanting to buy a football game. #
- "There is a ham here and I am stabbing it repeatedly." — Roxie (while talking on the phone to Aviry) #
- Join the army, meet interesting people, kill them — Graffiti At Bromley #
- Five Places to Snorkel on Your Cruise Vacation http://goo.gl/fb/AS0qs #
- "marge, where's that metal doobie you use to…dig…..food..?" "you mean a spoon?" "yeah yeah yeah" — -Homer #
- Love your life poor as it is. You may Perhaps have some pleasant, thrilling, glorious hours even in a poorhouse. — Henry David Thoreau #
- Weiler's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself. #
- By me sad hours seem long… — Romeo #
- "New York… when civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you." — David Letterman #
- We are all of us living in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. — Oscar Wilde #
- Hoare's Law of Large Problems: Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out. #
- … when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. — Sir Arthur Conan Doyle #
- May be we have to train the ethics. — Jin Chul Kim #
- Your fortune stateth: A man, a plan, a canal — Panama! — The Palindromist #
- Life is neither a spectacle nor a feast, it is predicament. — George Santayana #
- Preserve the old, but know the new. #
- "My dog signed it too. Sorry." — what Zach Horowitz wrote on his K2 snowboarding contract where his dog had chewed off the corner. #
- Your fortune stateth: Do something unusual today. Pay a bill. #
- Don't take life too seriously; you'll never get out of it alive. — Elbert Hubbard #
- Apple iPhones Deals Which Suits Your Pocket http://goo.gl/fb/x4hBO #
- Apple iPad Contract Deals are Attracting the Users in Huge Numbers http://goo.gl/fb/PBFT1 #
- Nokia C3 V Samsung Genio TXT The Genio is a Genius http://goo.gl/fb/gd0A9 #
- Sony Ericsson Xperia X8 V Samsung i8520 Halo http://goo.gl/fb/ZEVhM #
- Advantages with pay as you go phones http://goo.gl/fb/rH9XZ #
- An eel in the grass is an eel indeed. — my brother, Ben Sichel. #
- He who awaits much can expect little. — Gabriel Garcia Marquez #
- My heart has joined the Thousand, for my friend stopped running today. — Richard Adams, Watership Down #
- The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance. #
- Know the Digital TV deals properly before buying one http://goo.gl/fb/HWmGx #
- Apple iPhone 4 Deals use multimedia features at achievable price http://goo.gl/fb/LYj9P #
- Sony Ericsson Xperia X10 Deals Demand is Increasing http://goo.gl/fb/UGXCX #
- HTC Desire vs HTC HD2 With Free Gifts right gadget with extra devices http://goo.gl/fb/zxfuE #
- HTC Max 4G has max to offer you including deals http://goo.gl/fb/AxA8H #
- "I think he may be obsessive-repulsive." — Carrie G. describing a boy who sent her sister dead flowers after they quit dating. #
- "Grub first, then ethics." — Bertolt Brecht #
- The best computer is a man, and it's the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. — Wernher Von Braun #
- Nokia Mobile Phones Are For The Masses http://goo.gl/fb/06BPJ #
- Astrive student loans to meet educational expenses http://goo.gl/fb/ffgvI #
- Mobile Phones The easiest way to be in touch with your loved ones http://goo.gl/fb/EIc0t #
- Office Chairs – Giving a Feel of professionalism http://goo.gl/fb/1oAfv #
- Google Nexus One The best mobile phone deals are now available http://goo.gl/fb/nSMzS #
- Immanuel Kant but Kubla Khan. #
- "That's life, you've always got to convert something." — Mr. Rollings, physics teacher and the smartest man in the world. #
- What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours. — Woody Allen #
- Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery. — Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary" #
- Apple iphone 4 Deals expert handset completes every task http://goo.gl/fb/fZopR #
- Bad credit loans became easier to get for the people http://goo.gl/fb/Q4Qsn #
- Expansion Of Business With The Finest Brick Making Machine http://goo.gl/fb/GhvpO #
- Enjoy The Low Price Nokia X9 Deals http://goo.gl/fb/14C41 #
- A Money Saver Scheme HTC HD2 Contract Deals http://goo.gl/fb/02YuM #
- Your fortune stateth: Accent on helpful side of your nature. Drain the moat. #
- Paradoxically though it may seem, it is none the less true that life imitates art far more than art imitates life. — Oscar Wilde #
- The two that it said it couldn't, it did, and the one it didn't claim it couldn't, it didn't. — Paul #
- If love is blind, then I'm Helen Keller. — Kris #
- Bees Decline Poses Serious Threat to UK Economy http://goo.gl/fb/ta055 #
- Unsecured Business Loans Acquire the Cash Flow for Your Business http://goo.gl/fb/dW4T2 #
- Reforms International Search Review The Korean Search Market http://goo.gl/fb/reElg #
- You can call her an outdoor girl if she has the bloom of youth on her cheeks and the cheeks of youth in her bloomers. — Anonymous #
- "How can one conceive of a one party system in a country that has over 200 varieties of cheese?" — Charles de Gaulle #
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