Your fortune stateth: It is so very hard to be an on-your-own-take-care-of-yourself-because-there-is-no-one-else-to-do-it-for-you grown-up. #
We're walking on God! — Rosie, a young child, in response to the notion of an omnipresent God. #
According to the latest official figures, 43% of all statistics are totally worthless. #
I will show you fear in a handful of dust. — T.S. Eliot #
Fats Loves Madelyn #
Loan against Pension – Enjoy Abundant Cash Benefits http://goo.gl/fb/TTaDD #
Avoid filing that bankruptcy claim http://goo.gl/fb/aQBzM #
Sony Ericsson Phones The Musical Raga http://goo.gl/fb/Q8JTP #
No Fax Payday Loans – Money Sans The Trouble Of Excessive Paperwork http://goo.gl/fb/z69rI #
Sony Ericsson Xperia x10 Mini Pro Contract Deals Go For It http://goo.gl/fb/qC50F #
It is harder for a needle to go in the eye of a camel than a rich man to enter heaven. — (Not the Bible….) #
Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest. #
I'm not a horse, I'm a hornless Unicorn. — Upright Citizens Brigade #
"What do you give a man who has everything?" the pretty teenager asked her mother. "Encouragement, dear," she replied. #
"This computer makes me all frowny with pure nougat-filled hatred! — Jhonen Vasquez #
But I wanna be a spice girl too! — Mike #
A woman in love » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-25
"Are you 21?" — Lee M., to a substitute teacher in Government class. #
What makes the Universe so hard to comprehend is that there's nothing to compare it with. #
"We have art in order not to die of the truth." — Friedrich Nietzsche #
What's so funny? #
"Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today." — Hemon Wouk #
I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit the high notes I bet you can really see it in those genitals. — Jack Handey #
There are always two people in every picture: the photographer and the viewer. — Ansel Adams #
The great question – which I have not been able to answer – is, "What does a woman want?" — Sigmund Freud #
Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today because if you enjoy it today, you can do it again tomorrow. #
"Change is inevitable in a progressive country. Change is constant." — Benjamin Disraeli #
"I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem." — Ashleigh Brilliant #
A formal parsing algorithm should not always be used. — D. Gries #
Less and grayer hair. — Cal Ripkin Jr., baseball player, describing how he » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-24
"Are you 21?" — Lee M., to a substitute teacher in Government class. #
What makes the Universe so hard to comprehend is that there's nothing to compare it with. #
"We have art in order not to die of the truth." — Friedrich Nietzsche #
What's so funny? #
"Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today." — Hemon Wouk #
I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit the high notes I bet you can really see it in those genitals. — Jack Handey #
There are always two people in every picture: the photographer and the viewer. — Ansel Adams #
The great question – which I have not been able to answer – is, "What does a woman want?" — Sigmund Freud #
Don't put off for tomorrow what you can do today because if you enjoy it today, you can do it again tomorrow. #
"Change is inevitable in a progressive country. Change is constant." — Benjamin Disraeli #
"I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem." — Ashleigh Brilliant #
A formal parsing algorithm should not always be used. — D. Gries #
Less and grayer hair. — Cal Ripkin Jr., baseball player, describing how he » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-24
"Thus, we need an equitable distribution of wealth." — The Conclusion of all Logic in our US History course. #
"Deleted code has fewer bugs." — Xibo #
Mother told me to be good, but she's been wrong before. #
"Hey baby, I'll give you the best night of my life!" — Me experiencing a brain typo #
A great fortune in the hands of a fool is a great misfortune. — Anonymous #
"Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place." — Johnny Carson #
"That's life, you've always got to convert something." — Mr. Rollings, physics teacher and the smartest man in the world. #
He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet. #
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. — Will Rogers #
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation. #
Go on, get out – last words are for fools who haven't said enough. — Karl Marx #
Your fortune stateth: You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone. #
The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-23
"Thus, we need an equitable distribution of wealth." — The Conclusion of all Logic in our US History course. #
"Deleted code has fewer bugs." — Xibo #
Mother told me to be good, but she's been wrong before. #
"Hey baby, I'll give you the best night of my life!" — Me experiencing a brain typo #
A great fortune in the hands of a fool is a great misfortune. — Anonymous #
"Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place." — Johnny Carson #
"That's life, you've always got to convert something." — Mr. Rollings, physics teacher and the smartest man in the world. #
He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet. #
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. — Will Rogers #
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation. #
Go on, get out – last words are for fools who haven't said enough. — Karl Marx #
Your fortune stateth: You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone. #
The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-23
Vita brevis, ars longa, — Hippocrates #
The aim of science is not to open the door to infinite wisdom, but to set a limit to infinite error. — Bertolt Brecht, #
A man who has committed a mistake and doesn't correct it is committing another mistake. — Confucius #
How many points do you get for a 3-pointer? — Katrina Meyer #
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone. #
Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers. — Rainer Maria Rilke #
You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think. — Dorothy Parker #
You can never do just one thing. — Hardin #
"Like all dreamers, I mistook disenchantment for truth." — Jean-Paul Sartre #
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. — Winston Churchill #
Your fortune stateth: Excellent day for putting Slinkies on an escalator. #
"Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years." — George Burns #
A hundred thousand lemmings can't be wrong! #
"Nothing like seeing your best friend » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-22
Vita brevis, ars longa, — Hippocrates #
The aim of science is not to open the door to infinite wisdom, but to set a limit to infinite error. — Bertolt Brecht, #
A man who has committed a mistake and doesn't correct it is committing another mistake. — Confucius #
How many points do you get for a 3-pointer? — Katrina Meyer #
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone. #
Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers. — Rainer Maria Rilke #
You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think. — Dorothy Parker #
You can never do just one thing. — Hardin #
"Like all dreamers, I mistook disenchantment for truth." — Jean-Paul Sartre #
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. — Winston Churchill #
Your fortune stateth: Excellent day for putting Slinkies on an escalator. #
"Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years." — George Burns #
A hundred thousand lemmings can't be wrong! #
"Nothing like seeing your best friend » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-22
Business is a lot like a game of tennis – those who serve well usually end up winning — Anonymous #
The only possible interpretation of any research whatever in the `social sciences' is: some do, some don't. — Ernest Rutherford #
PREDICAMENT, n. The wage of consistency. — Ambrose Bierce #
(Beth yawns really big and doesn't bother to cover her mouth.) Brad looking at her: "You're hired." #
Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored. — George Saunders' dying words #
"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing." — attributed to Albert Einstein #
Never fear shadows…. that always means there is a light shining somewhere. — Jonathan Santos #
Architecture is the art of how to waste space. — Philip Johnson #
"Chastity always takes its toll. In some it produces pimples; in others, sex laws." — Karl Kraus #
Madness takes its toll. #
It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated. — Alec Bourne #
Murphy's Law of Research: Enough research will tend to support your theory. #
"There is nothing outside the text." — Jacques Derrida #
"An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-21
You can never do too much drawing. — Tintoretto #
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives. #
Words lead to deeds…. They prepare the soul, make it ready, and move it to tenderness. — Anonymous #
Simon's Law: Everything put together falls apart sooner or later. #
f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng. #
Immanuel doesn't pun, he Kant. #
The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed. — Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort #
Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a losttradition. — Jacques Barzun #
In such ugly times, the only true protest is beauty. — Phil Ochs #
Steele's Plagiarism of Somebody's Philosophy: Everybody should believe in something — I believe I'll have another drink. #
"The whole dream of democracy is to raise the proletarian to the level of stupidity attained by the bourgeois." — Gustave Flaubert #
Mene, mene, tekel, upharsen. #
Have no fear of perfection, you'll never reach it. — Salvador Dali #
How wonderful yellow is. It stands for the sun — Vincent van Gogh #
It is better to have loved and lost than » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-20
REFERENDUM, n. A law for submission of proposed legislation to a popular vote to learn the nonsensus of public opinion. — Ambrose Bierce #
I want to network every single human brain. — Ron Urwongse #
To achieve harmony in bad taste is the height of elegance. — Jean Genet , "The Thief's Journal" #
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making the world believe that he didn't exist. — Kevin Spacey "The Usual Suspects" #
"Dictators ride to and fro upon tigers which they dare not dismount. And the tigers are getting hungry." — Winston Churchill #
Democracy, the decietful theory that the jew would insinuate. Namely that all men are created equal. — Adolf Hitler, "Mein Kampf" #
A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary. — Thomas Carruthers #
"I smell good today and my hair is not very loud." — Jen #
"CRAZY RUNNING FEMALE!!!!!!" — Tara, while running down a hill. #
Anyone who knows a strange fact shares in its singularity. — Jean Genet #
People are the only animals who eat themselves to death. — Anonymous #
Sic Transit Gloria Thursdi. #
Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. #
I wanted to » » See all Twitter Updates for 2010-08-19